February 19, 2026
Forty-seven years have passed since my first date with my life-partner Nancy Larson. Our adventure together has been beyond my wildest dreams, and we have much to be grateful for. After learning to live without alcohol, and learning to surrender Read more…
February 18, 2026
Life will continue to present challenges, so in this post I describe two more critical parent coping skills—using the personal instrument panel and the well-being checklist. These help you and your co-parent identify and solve problems and maintain your strength Read more…
Ideally, you’ll create a partnership embodying a suitable balance of power and responsibility. You and your partner negotiate fair and mutually beneficial sharing of responsibilities, roles, decision-making, and effort toward common goals. This is an excerpt from my book Purposeful Read more…
February 17, 2026
Once you and your co-parent (if applicable) agree on your priorities and intervention options, you face the challenge of carrying these out. Parental influence is a powerful tool when used wisely. The challenge is you don’t control children’s choices so Read more…
As human beings, we are always learning. In dealing with parenting challenges, we need to understand which parenting strategies are effective and what parenting choices make the situation worse. This class is based upon thinking and behavior. That means we Read more…
This post introduces Situation Analysis, the first of six Critical Parent Coping Skills. Coping skills to help you recognize, avoid and cope with unexpected family developments. That is, RECOGNIZE situations in which you are likely to engage in ineffective parenting Read more…
February 16, 2026
In this post, I recommend you create family development goals based on what you learned about your parenting challenges when you completed the Parent and Family Challenges Survey. Set behavior change goals that support creating the family environment you want. Read more…
We now understand clearly the process of how to change behavior patterns. Prochaska and DiClemente first described this while studying cigarette smokers trying to quit. Understanding exactly how people change empowers us, and each step we make toward change becomes Read more…
How do you set priorities when dealing with parenting challenges? If you’re like most parents, you want to solve family problems in a win-win manner that helps everyone get on with life in a positive way. Nobody gets hurt or Read more…
Before a young person can meet the challenges and responsibilities of adulthood, they need to mature and develop the essential self-knowledge and skills required in the adult world. A strong start on this learning provides the foundation for success in Read more…
Responsibility is a critical ingredient for creating a healthy family. When you take full responsibility for your part (both positive and negative) in any family challenges you face, this prepares you to learn skills you need, and move toward being Read more…
February 15, 2026
As you guide children through the first few years of life, take the opportunity to continually teach them about how the world works. Everyone, starting the parents, has specific responsibilities—even if these aren’t written down anywhere. In an earlier posts, Read more…
February 14, 2026
All families must learn to resolve conflict fairly. As a family therapist, I discovered that many of us make the same mistakes over and over in conflict situations. We don’t resolve the conflict, and can also make things worse, often Read more…
Families are not democracies, where everyone has an equal voice in making decisions. But, children of all ages have a right to their opinions, and need to give their ideas on decisions that affect them. Parents or parent figures, as Read more…
February 13, 2026
A frustrating thing about intimate relationships is that when we most need to communicate positively, we’re least able to. We get mad, stressed, hurt, or scared, and do and say things we wish we hadn’t, or we don’t feel like Read more…