Characteristics of a Functional Family

Family Resources

In this post I cite the work of Dolores Curran who beautifully describes the characteristics of a functional family and I describe a family I admired while growing up.

Families and communities that enhance children’s abilities to meet their basic human needs provide protection, affection, stability, support, respect, appropriate freedom, and education to their members. Dolores Curran describes characteristics that are important dimensions of family health (Traits of a Healthy Family):

• The parents love each other and their children.
• Family members talk and listen to each other.
• Family members respect and support each other.
• Family members trust and rely on each other.
• Members shared responsibility reasonably and fairly.
• Family members do things together as a family.
• There are clear family values about right and wrong.
• There are positive family traditions and rituals.

My name is Lane Lasater, a retired clinical psychologist. In gratitude for the life I have been given, I am sharing everything I learned during my career and personal life here on my website http://www.LaneLasater.com and on my YouTube Channel Life Roadmaps from a Retired Psychologist  https://www.youtube.com/@lane205   Each post contains my written material, an AI generated graphic, a 15-17 minute audio summary, and a 5-7 minute video summarizing the material. A printable and fillable PDF “Exercises to Support Recovery from Family Trauma Syndrome” with each exercise I describe in my videos can be downloaded here: Transcending Family Trauma Workbook

Exceptional Family Health: The Stewarts

Emily and John Stewart spend a few minutes alone with each other before dinner every evening. Married twenty-four years, they maintain a romantic excitement about each other. They carefully give attention to each other and to their five children. John and Emily are often hugging and kissing or have their arms around each other, and John calls Emily “sweetheart.” Neighborhood children of all ages love to visit their house to play with the Stewart children. This family seems to have love to spare. Their house is a home base for the children’s activities, and there are many comings and goings, but peace prevails.

The Stewarts are not without challenges. Brandon, their third child, developed leukemia and died at age twelve. During his illness, the entire family included and supported Brandon, but each child received attention. At the time of his death, the Stewarts grieved together and individually. They remember Brandon several times each year and visit his grave together. John and Emily both have strong religious faith, and this helped them face Brandon’s death. Although they belong to different churches, they accept this difference in one another peacefully.

Some Stewart children excel in school and others don’t, but each member has his or her special distinction in the family for acrobatics, singing, humor, schoolwork, or outdoor activities. The family takes a summer trip each year to a wilderness campground. Everyone pitches in to accomplish the camping tasks. Family members seem to love being who they are as individuals, and each person loves being a “Stewart.”